One Year Hairiversary: Why I'll Never Look Back
- 46 minutes ago
- 7 min read
June 3, 2025 was the day everything changed.
A year ago today, my wife Jayme packed up with me and drove to San Diego, California to visit the Toupee Queen. I had spent six years watching hair systems online, quietly convincing myself it wasn't something I could actually do. Too nervous. Too worried about what people would think. Too stressed about the upkeep, the cost, all of it.
But something finally clicked, and I made the decision.
And Jayme? She didn't just support me. She said, "I'm going with you, and I'm going to learn how to do it." That's my wife.
On June 3, 2025, I walked out with a full head of hair for the first time in years, and I have never looked back.
Six Years of Watching from the Sidelines
Here is something I have never fully said out loud: I first discovered hair systems about six years before I ever tried one. Six years of watching videos, reading reviews, looking at before and afters, and then closing the browser and telling myself it wasn't for me.
The excuses were easy to find. What if it looked fake? What if people could tell? What if I couldn't keep up with the maintenance? What if it was too expensive and I had wasted all that money on something that didn't work?
And underneath all of it, the real fear: what would people think of me?
That kept me stuck for a long time. And I don't think I am alone in that. There is a specific kind of vulnerability that comes with being a man who wants to do something about his appearance but feels like he isn't supposed to care. Like caring about how you look somehow makes you less. I felt that for years.
But eventually I got tired of looking at pictures of myself and immediately going to the hairline. I got tired of the self-talk. And I finally decided that if I wanted to try it, I owed it to myself to just try it.
The Trip That Changed Everything
Jayme NEVER ONCE made fun of me, made negative comments, talked me out of wanting a hairsystem. Quite the contrary, she was always telling me to just do it! So when I told Jayme I booked my appointment, in perfect Jayme fashion, she did not just say, "sounds good, let me know how it goes." She showed up. She learned the process, asked all the questions, and made sure she knew exactly how to help me maintain it when we got home.
That kind of support is not small. It meant I was not doing this alone.
I wanted to make the drive and go to The Toupee Queen because she is the best in all the land. I knew that if I was going to do it, I wanted to have my first installation done by an absolute pro! Of course the whole experience was incredible. She made the whole process feel completely normal and totally low-pressure. If you are someone who has been curious about hair systems and does not know where to start, she is someone worth knowing about.
We spent the day in San Diego, and I walked out of there a different person. Not just because of the hair, but because I had finally stopped letting fear make decisions for me. Check out Emily at Toupee Queen she is the best!
The Fear Nobody Talks About
I won't pretend the first few weeks were totally easy. I knew the hair looked great. But there was still that nervous feeling of running into people who hadn't seen me in a while. Would they say something? Would it be awkward?
It wasn't.
People were accepting, loving, and kind. Even when I started sharing it online, the response was overwhelmingly positive. Sure, there are trolls on the internet. There always will be. But honestly? I don't care what they think. I didn't do this for them.
I did this for me.
And here is what I have realized: most people are not nearly as focused on us as we think they are. The version of the conversation I had rehearsed in my head for six years never actually happened. People just saw me, smiled, said I looked great, and moved on. The fear was almost entirely in my own head.
One Year of Transformation
Here is what one year has looked like.
I lost about 60 pounds. I stopped negatively talking about how I look, something I had done my entire life up to this point. I look at pictures of myself now and I am not fixated on my hairline. I feel younger. I feel confident. And Jayme notices it every single day.
My kids love it too. That part still gets me.
There is something powerful about liking what you see when you look in the mirror. Not in a vain way. In an "I can finally stop fighting this battle in my head" kind of way. The mental energy I used to spend on insecurity about my appearance has been redirected toward things that actually matter. My marriage. My kids. My work. My health.
I genuinely believe the confidence shift contributed to the weight loss. When you start feeling good about yourself in one area, it creates momentum everywhere else. That has absolutely been true for me.
Why Hair Systems Deserve More Respect
I want to say something directly: if people can get hair extensions, eyelash extensions, self-tanners, or cosmetic treatments to help them feel better about how they look, why can't men have a hair system?
We celebrate when people go to the gym to transform their bodies. We celebrate skin care routines and fashion choices and anything else that helps someone feel like their best self. But somewhere along the way, men were told that caring about hair loss was off limits. That you either embrace it or you suffer quietly.
I reject that.
Balding is not a bad thing. I want to be clear about that. Plenty of men rock a shaved head and look incredible. My father, the OG Decked Out Dad has been bald my whole life and I think he looks amazing and he loves being bald. And that is perfect for him and many others who prefer to just not have hair. Maybe someday I will choose to go that direction. But right now, I love having hair. I like what I look like better with it. And for the first time in my life, I am not tearing myself apart when I look in the mirror.
That is worth everything to me.
From San Diego to a Brand Partnership
What started with a trip to the Toupee Queen turned into something I never expected. After I started sharing my hair journey openly online, LaVivid Hair Systems reached out and asked me to be a partner.
Over the past year, working with LaVivid has been incredible. Their systems are the real deal, and the quality speaks for itself. Being able to represent a brand I actually use and believe in is something I do not take lightly.
If you are a guy who has ever been curious about this but felt scared or embarrassed, I want you to know: I get it. I was you. I spent six years being you. And I am so glad I finally just did it. Use my code ANDY15 at checkout on the LaVivid website for a discount on your first system. And if you have questions, reach out. I mean that.
You Can Ask Me Anything
I have had so many men reach out to me with questions about hair systems, and I love every single one of those conversations. Questions about the process, the cost, the maintenance, how to tell your family, how to handle the comments. I have been through all of it. I am also very thankful to others who have paved the way and helped me along the way. Jared has been completely influential on the process, products, and even the mental health process of having new hair. He has an amazing website that lets you know about salons who do hair systems close to you. Check Mane Map out! He also shares products HERE that he loves and I highly recommend him as a reference!
I am completely open and honest about wearing a hair system because I have nothing to hide. This is part of my story, and I am proud of it.
Most people, when they find out, are genuinely shocked. That tells me the stigma is slowly fading, and I am proud to be part of that shift. Every guy who reaches out to me and eventually decides to try it, or even just decides to stop being so hard on himself, makes this whole thing worth it.
Here's to Year Two
One year. Sixty pounds. A whole new level of confidence. A LaVivid partnership I am incredibly grateful for. And a wife who drove to San Diego just to learn how to do my hair.
Not bad for a bald guy from Queen Creek.
If you are sitting where I was six years ago, watching from the sidelines and talking yourself out of it, just know that the leap is worth it. You deserve to like the way you look. And you do not have to do it alone.
Here's to year two.
Follow along on Instagram @deckedoutdad, Tik Tok @thedeckedoutdad and Facebook @decked-out-dad for more adventures of year two with a hairsystem!
In the meantime enjoy your life and if there is something you have been wanting to do for yourself, just go do it! What are you waiting for?
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